Communication

Results can best be realized when both parents and the School support each other. Students often try to thwart that relationship—for obvious reasons. A favorite tactic used by students is telling us what terrible parents you are, at the same time telling you what a dreadful school we are. It is critical that we support each other, or else students feel justified in not working towards making changes in their lives. The students may prefer that we are both focused on each other’s imperfections rather than what the student needs to do. Communication between parents and the School is vital in the support process. The specific communication elements of your School (addressed in this chapter) have been created and implemented to assist you and your family as you move forward towards achieving the goals you desire for your family.

Family Representative

A key member of our staff in the area of communication between the School and your family is your family representative. The main role of the family representative is to ensure that your child is receiving quality care and opportunities for effective growth. Your child’s family representative watch over your child's needs and progress on your behalf. The family representative is in regular contact with your child and is your point of contact with the School. The family representative will contact you to set up a regularly-scheduled phone call, in order to coordinate updates and progress reports. As a rule, these regularly scheduled phone calls take place every two weeks. Your family representative, however, will try to establish a schedule that will meet your family’s needs. You should understand, however, that a number of factors may influence scheduling of these phone calls. Such factors include:

Office hours

Other previously scheduled phone calls

Regularly scheduled meetings

Other commitments associated with working with students

We appreciate your understanding if we are unable to schedule a phone call with you at exactly the time you desire.

It is very important that you call your family representatives at the regular scheduled time. If you are unable to call your family representative within five minutes of your scheduled time, you will need to call at your next scheduled time, unless it is an emergency. Please be aware that family representatives have prior scheduling commitments that do not allow them to receive or make calls in between regularly scheduled phone calls. You may contact your family representative by email between scheduled phone calls if necessary. Please note that any calls from your family representative would only be for some special reason and will only be made on a collect basis.

Please be aware that due to staff changes, promotions and other factors, your family representative may change. Such changes can offer added benefits to your child, such as an opportunity for them, and you, to see how they handle and adjust to change. An important life lesson, as change is a constant in life.

Communication With Your Child

Mail

You may correspond by mail as often as you desire, but your child will receive mail only on scheduled mail days. Family representatives suggest that one letter per week is adequate.

Only parents may send mail to the students. All mail sent to the students is opened in the presence of a staff member, and is thus monitored for contraband or inappropriate items.

Students may only send mail to their parents (or guardians); the parents can then distribute it as they see fit. The School requests that parents obtain a return address stamp or stickers, and send one to their family representative. Doing so helps ensure that mail is coming only from, or going to, parents.

Telephone Privileges

As indicated in the enrollment agreement, phone calls are a pivilege tht your child must earn by attaining Advanced status. The time it takes to reach this level varies from child to child; the process is an important and necessary one. Your child will appreciate the phone calls to you much more when he or she has to work hard to earn them. Phone calls any earlier in your child's progress would be destructive and disruptive, as he/she may be more concerned about trying to convince you that he/she should be taken out of the School--this rather than focusing on his/her own progress or making necessary changes. Even when phone calls are finally permitted, they are short and not too frequent. There are sound reasons for doing so:

It helps keep patrental costs down. All calls are on a collect basis.

All phone calls require a substantial amount of effort and logistics to complete.

It is worth repeating that it is critical that your child view talking to you on the phone as a privilege that he/she must earn or else we short change the learning process.

Exceptions

PLEASE DO NOT ASK US TO MAKE AN EXCEPTION just so that you can speak to your child if he/she has not earned telephone privileges! It is unfair to the other students and their parents to do so. Although they may appear harmless or insignificant, exceptions affect all students. Word quickly spreads and staff are inundated with questions like, "Why does Tom get to make a phone call and I don't?" Or, "Don't my parents want to talk to me on the phone as badly as Tom's?" Telephone privileges are such a sensitive area that the enrollment agreement outlines tht no phone calls will be allowed before students earn Achievement status. Once students have earned phone privileges, they are only permitted to call their parents/guardians.

Packages

Packages may be sent only on your student's birthday and at Christmas. Students often ask their parents to send them packages at other times. Some of the items requested may not really be needed or even appropriate. We are always happy to verify the need for any requested item. Even if your child has a legitimate need for some item, it is usually better to let us obtain it and then have you reimburse us. Sending a package takes a long time and may be lost, stolen, or have items spoiled or damaged. Please do NOT send snack foods, as this undermines the system of status privileges.

Visits

We recommend your first visit with your child be the Parent/Child 1 (PC1) workshop held at the School. You will be scheduled for a PC1 shortly after your child has been in the school for seven months. Criteria for attending a PC1 workshop is the student must complete the Discovery seminar, and the parent must complete the Discovery seminar for parents. Upon review and approval of the School, a PC1 can be scheduled earlier if both the parent and the child have completed a Focus seminar.

If you do not plan on attending a Parent/Child workshop for your first visit, then you must wait until your child reaches Service Status. However, tours and visits to the facility, without your child seeing you, can be arranged at anytime with your Family Rep.

Visitors, other than parents, must be approved by both the parents and the family representative. Together they will determine the stucture of the visit. All visits (on-ground basis, off-grounds visits, and home visits) are scheduled with the family representative. The initial visit will only be approved if the telephone calls with the parents have been productive.

Once your child achieves High Honor status, your child is eligible for overnight visits within the vicinity of the School. The family representative will confer with the Administration to determine eligibility.

When your child achieves High Honor status, home visits are encouraged and recommended. Home visits are crucial as a testing ground for the student's eventual return home. Home visits are not considered before the student is on High Honor Status. Home visits are determined on an individual basis according to each student's progress.

Exceptions

As with phone privileges, plese REFRAIN FROM REQUESTING ANY EXCEPTIONS to the visiting rules as they too negatively affect the progress of ALL students in the School--including your child. Parents agree to these conditions when they enrolled their child at the School.

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Preface to the Grievance Procedure

Occasionally students make it difficult for their parents by claiming that they have been treated unfairly. They may also feel or represent that certain conditions exist at the School that are not in their best interest. Parents may wonder whether their child is manipulating them or there is a valid concern. The grievance policy allows students and parents to air these concerns and have them properly reviewed by persons inside, and outside, the School.

If your child has a complaint, emcourage him/her to use the grievance procedure. The grievance procedure is designed with the need for clear communication in mind. It allows your child's concerns to be directed to the appropriate administrative personnel. The School is more than willing to send parents a copy of the grievance, the proceedings and the findings on each level or appeal. Such openness is designed to keep all parties informed. The School actively encourages parents to participate in the process.

Encouraging students to utilize the grievance procedure fosters ownership in the solution. Non-participation in the procedure by students tends to indicate that either the issue was not particularly important, or that they have another agenda. Experience indicates that these agendas often include manipulation of parents and their emotions, i.e. "pushing your buttons" or exploiting your emotions and reactions.

The grievance policy also allows parents to disegage and let their child take personal responsibility. Doing so also breaks the cycle of non-working patterns where parents rescue their child. The child learns to solve his own problems, and important growth and development opportunities occur.

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Student Grievance Policy

Philosophy

"To ensure that all students receive fair and equitable treatment within the policies and procedures of the School."

Policy

If a student feels that he/she has been treated unfairly, he/she may file a grievance by filling out a form and placing it in the grievance/suggestion box (located in the dining area) or giving it to the School director. All grievances are reviewed by the staff assigned by the administration. All findings may be appealed.

Levels of Appeal

Special Review Board assigned by the director

Independent Review

Director

Below is an example of the Student Grievance Form available to the students at their School.

Student Grievance Form

Name______________________________ Date _________________________

I am filing a grievance as described below:

Signed____________________ Received by________________Date_________

*****************************************************************
Grievance Reviewed by __________________________ Date_______________

Appeal requested:             Yes_____     No_____

Signed_____________________________________ Date _________________                                           Staff

Signed_____________________________________ Date_________________
                                        Student

Procedures and Process to Address Parent Concerns

There is an operational chain of command for parents with concerns. As with most issues, the first point of contact is the family representative. The following outlines the order of contact. If concerns are not addressed at one level, then parents should feel free to take them to the next level.

Family Representative

Parent Coordinator

Director

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Action Item for Chapter 7:

Fill out the School Information Worksheet and fax or email to school. For a printable version of the worksheet, click here.